Bob and I have been feverishly sorting, purging, packing and repacking...filling our rented storage space with boxes we're taking with us to Pittsfield.
Funny how it goes...buying a house one minute and moving in an entirely new direction the next.
We're definitely moving...to Pittsfield...a place I'd never thought I'd live in again...a place I thought I'd never get my husband to live in.
He said to me last night..."I'm getting really excited now".
As for me...I am feeling kinda weird. I thought if the prospect of moving back home ever came up, I'd be really excited, ecstatic, jumping up and down for joy...but I'm not.
I keep plodding along, waiting for it to sink in, waiting for some spark of happiness to ignite. It hasn't happened yet. It's like, I know what is supposed to be good for me and Bob, I know what is supposed to be good for my kids...like eating green leafy vegetables...I like them, but I don't want to eat them everyday. Moving to Pittsfield is like that...it's the better choice...there is so much more that is good for us THERE than HERE, but I am missing things I love around here already...and it's clouding my joy of moving to a place I have loved and longed for. I want to keep the closeness of the ocean, the closeness of the city. I want to keep the ability to find great deals in the vasteness that is the shopping mecca on Rte. 1. I want to keep tasting the foods I know I won't get in the Berkshires. I want to keep my friends here close. I want to be there for my patients...the ones I've gotten to love...when it is their time to go.
I want to continue to work with my fellow nurses and CNAs at the North End...amazing how fast they accepted me and how nice it is to be there. And I'll miss earning what I do...I'll be taking a big cut in pay, probably doing more than I do here...it's a shame. I'll miss our doctors, our dentist, Thomas' school and teachers. And I'll miss not being around for Andrew while he's at BU...our thursday and saturdays connecting...getting coffee...getting his treats for the week. And I'll miss so much more.
I WON'T miss the noise of people, cars and planes overhead, so close you can read the numbers on their sides, the grouchiness/gruffness of the natives, the pushing and jostling to get on a packed train, high priced rentals, fear that I won't move my car properly on street cleaning day...and I'll get another $210 tow/ticket, hearing about daily shootings and deaths...so senseless, in the nearby neighborhoods. And so much more.
I won't miss my occassional pangs of homesickness...cuz I'll already be home.
We're moving to 25 Marcella Ave. Pittsfield 01201.
It's on the 1st floor of a duplex. The landlord lives upstairs. The wife is a 4th grade teacher at Egremont, where Thomas will go to school. Where Andrew went and graduated from 5th grade before we moved to Eastie. It's only a street away.
They have a huge yard. The street is full of kids Thomas' age. My sister only lives 2 streets away. Our whole family is there...well, not everyone...Mom on the Cape and Sherry in Taunton, Unc in Framingham, Maurya in JP...they won't be as close, but we'll make a more concerted effort to see them, more than we do now...as Maurya once said, she saw me more when I lived in Pittsfield.
I'll be working in Great Barrington, at Fairview Commons, it looks like. They offered me the job of charge nurse yesterday. I will accept it today.
I'll be going from working every weekend, nights to monday-friday days.
A stepping stone I'm looking at it as. I want to work in the hospital, BMC. I want to work rehab again. But to apply to an internal position, I have to work 6 months. Fairview is part of the system. It's gonna be hell driving there in the winter...I'll have to get a more reliable car.
We'll be able to buy a decent house, with a yard. A FOREVER HOME. Andrew will take REAL breaks from school, although he'll continue summering over at BU and work. Thomas will enjoy growing up with his cousins like I did.
Bob and I will get out more. We'll get a dog.
And maybe some of my friends and all of our family here will pay us a visit
there. Have a bonfire at Sue and Matts (or our house someday), see the stars, shine so bright and hear loud thunderstorms. Something lacking here in Eastie.
Going to get spring water, go fishing, bike riding, sunday drives up into the mountains, and our yearly trips to go shopping in Boston, just the girls.
It's all good. I have to believe it.
Here is a short video about the house we almost bought, it doesn't really show much, just the view:
No comments:
Post a Comment